3 Coping Tips with Grief and Tragedy | Zachary Tims Dies at 42

By Published On: August 15th, 20112.9 min read

Coping with Grief and Tragedy: Pastor Zachary Tims Dies at 42.

The nation is grieving the tragic loss of Pastor Zachary. According to several news sources, Tims, Senior Pastor of New Destiny Christian Center of Apopka, was found dead in a New York City hotel room on Friday. The beloved pastor was the leader of more than 7,000 members and the father of 4 children.

 

The cause of Tims death has not been confirmed, however, the 42-year-old pastor was found in The W hotel in New York on Broadway. His congregation will remember him as one of the most kind-hearted pastors that gave to Apopka/Orlando community. Tims and his New Destiny congregation built a $3.4 million youth center where children and teens could go after school. This effort was designed to keep youth from engaging in negative behaviors that include gangs, drugs, promiscuity, and crime.

In the aftermath, many people are faced with the loss of a leader, a father, a son, and a brother.  How can a community grieve such a tragic loss? First, we must understand the definition of grief.

What is GRIEF?

Everyone experiences grief at some point in life. Grief is a common reaction to trauma, loss, and bereavement. Grief is usually associated with the death of a loved one; however, grief may also include loss of a job, financial stability, health, marriage, friendship, or dreams. According to Kubler-Ross, there are five stages of grief.

5 Stages of Grief:

1) Denial (this cannot be happening to me!)

2) Anger (why is this happening to me?)

3) Bargaining (I promise I’ll be a better person if…)

4) Depression (I don’t care anymore)

5) Acceptance (I’ve accepted whatever comes)

 What are symptoms of Grief?

Grief affects people in a variety of ways. If you are struggling with grief you may experience the following symptoms derived from Kubler-Ross’ stages of grief:

1)  Disbelief/Shock – Shortly following a loss, it will be exceptionally difficult to accept the loss.

2)  Depression—Symptoms of depression are common when faced with tremendous loss and grief. Sadness, despair, loneliness, emptiness, and hopelessness may intensify.

3)   Remorse – It is common to experience feelings of remorse or guilt when you loose a loved one. It is not unusual to have feelings of frustration and anger during this phase of the grief cycle.

4)   Anxiety/Fear – Panic attacks may also become a focus when struggling with the grief process. Helplessness and anxiousness are common symptoms of grief.

5)    Physical Symptoms – Grief is an emotional and physical process. Somatic (physical) symptoms may emerge when faced with the grieving process: muscle tension, insomnia, weight loss, weight gain, fatigue, or nausea.

What to do?

  1. Seek help: Grief counseling, EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing), EFT (Emotion Freedom Technique), CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) and/or Support group.
  2. Develop a self-care program
  3. Surround yourself with a strong support system

When to seek help?

  1. If you feel suicidal or if you feel that you will harm yourself
  2. If you are unable to maintain normal, daily functioning
  3. If you blame yourself excessively
  4. If you feel disconnected or dissociated
  5. If you feel unusually numb
  6. If you cannot trust anyone

If you or someone you know are struggling with depression or anxiety as a result of grief, contact a therapist or counselor for help.

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author avatar
Jada Jackson
National TV Host of Emotional Mojo | Jada Jackson, MS, LMHC, Licensed Mental Health Counselor, is called by national TV News outlets and organizations to speak on a variety of topics effecting today's youth, young adults and couples. Jada is an Author, International Communicator, providing Counseling to Couples, Families, and Individuals. She is also a Self-Esteem Coach and Image Enhancement Specialist for Students, Models, and Professionals. As an international model and Commentator with Ebony Fashion Fair she quickly realized the effects of the modeling industry, not only on society, but also the self-image issues of models worldwide. Her experiences lead her to author Be-You-tiful to share her journey on obtaining her healthy self-image to help men and women find their true identity. Societies pressures on Body Image effects people in many different ways: depression, anxiety, self esteem, cutting, eating disorders, sexual promiscuity, teen pregnancy, substance abuse, relationship issues and more. Jada shares her experience, international success and passion to guide others into meaningful and purposeful living, Read more information on Jada Jackson on this site.

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About the Author: Jada Jackson

National TV Host of Emotional Mojo | Jada Jackson, MS, LMHC, Licensed Mental Health Counselor, is called by national TV News outlets and organizations to speak on a variety of topics effecting today's youth, young adults and couples. Jada is an Author, International Communicator, providing Counseling to Couples, Families, and Individuals. She is also a Self-Esteem Coach and Image Enhancement Specialist for Students, Models, and Professionals. As an international model and Commentator with Ebony Fashion Fair she quickly realized the effects of the modeling industry, not only on society, but also the self-image issues of models worldwide. Her experiences lead her to author Be-You-tiful to share her journey on obtaining her healthy self-image to help men and women find their true identity. Societies pressures on Body Image effects people in many different ways: depression, anxiety, self esteem, cutting, eating disorders, sexual promiscuity, teen pregnancy, substance abuse, relationship issues and more. Jada shares her experience, international success and passion to guide others into meaningful and purposeful living, Read more information on Jada Jackson on this site.

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author avatar
Jada Jackson
National TV Host of Emotional Mojo | Jada Jackson, MS, LMHC, Licensed Mental Health Counselor, is called by national TV News outlets and organizations to speak on a variety of topics effecting today's youth, young adults and couples. Jada is an Author, International Communicator, providing Counseling to Couples, Families, and Individuals. She is also a Self-Esteem Coach and Image Enhancement Specialist for Students, Models, and Professionals. As an international model and Commentator with Ebony Fashion Fair she quickly realized the effects of the modeling industry, not only on society, but also the self-image issues of models worldwide. Her experiences lead her to author Be-You-tiful to share her journey on obtaining her healthy self-image to help men and women find their true identity. Societies pressures on Body Image effects people in many different ways: depression, anxiety, self esteem, cutting, eating disorders, sexual promiscuity, teen pregnancy, substance abuse, relationship issues and more. Jada shares her experience, international success and passion to guide others into meaningful and purposeful living, Read more information on Jada Jackson on this site.