Mommy I want that new video game! Dad I want the new I-Phone! Grandma I want the new Mac Book! Most parents have heard some variation of the above statements. Parents usually are the primary financial educators for their children. Time after time, I have seen young people receive sizable allowances or inheritances, without a base of knowledge in financial planning. Consider the following five points to assist the children in your life to have a responsible attitude about money.
Be a Role Model
The way parents spend money and the way children view money has a significant correlation. Consider discussing the family’s financial goals and plans with the children. How much you share is to your discretion, but include the younger generation in at least a portion of the monthly management. How parents deal with money issues, from the monthly bills to planning family vacations can be important in teaching the children money management and the value of money.
Encourage Savings and Investments
To encourage children to save money is one of the simplest ways to encourage a responsible attitude about money. This could include designating a portion of a child’s allowance to a saving account, or making gifts of cash directly to an account in their name. Parents can discuss the account statements with the children and introduce the concept “ paying yourself first”.
Develop a Sense of Financial Empowerment
It is important that parents develop responsible spending habits by well thought-out choices. In order to guide and direct rather than dictate the savings and spending. Take children on window-shopping trips to compare prices and products and adopt the mind set that every trip to a store is an exercise leading to a potential purchase. For example, consider limiting impulse buying by implementing a rule that prices and products are compared at a minimum of three locations.
Give Unto Others
Involve children in the financial decisions regarding philanthropy. By helping children contribute time or money to a charitable cause, it can teach them that money is important in ways others than personal consumption.
Parenting with Love & Logic: Teaching Children Responsibility
Do you remember the Cosby Show where six year old Rudy wants to stay up late like the rest of the Huxtable family?Knowing that this was an opportunity for Rudy to learn responsibility, Cliff and Claire allow Rudy to stay up late. Rudy’s enthusiasm for being a night owl wanes after a few nights of staying up late watching the Johnny Carson Show and then having to get up early for school the next morning. Through no nagging and lecturing by Cliff and Claire, Rudy learned that in order to function on a day to day basis she must get a full night’s sleep.Many parents end up in similar situations with their children, but miss the opportunity to teach their children responsibility. The result of this missed opportunity is whiny, ungrateful, dependent children who grow up to be whiny, ungrateful, dependent adults. Cliff and Claire Huxtable, although unknowingly, were using a technique that Dr. Foster Cline and Jim Fay call Parenting with Love & Logic. The principles that Cline and Foster teach are invaluable. When I counsel children and adolescents of all ages, I use their principles—asking questions, setting limits, and giving choices. As a caveat, it doesn’t work for all families, but in the families in which I used these techniques for the past five years, I have seen a marked improvement
We live in a society that is yearning for leaders. Is your child going to become a leader of tomorrow, responsible and wise, or follow others?
If you and/or your spouse are struggling with your child(ren) allow us the opportunity to serve you by teaching you some of these techniques. We also work with children and adolescents of all ages, using play and art therapy and other hands-on techniques.
Love Languages for Children
There are two things every adult longs to do: connect and contribute. To be affirmed and play a role. Children and adolescents are no different. They desire to be acknowledged in unique personal ways. In Gary Chapman’s Five Love Languages for Children, Chapman indicates those five love languages are Words of Affirmation, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch. Children and adolescents, like adults, respond better when they are loved in distinctive ways. For parents, if you child is hedging at completing an assigned task or chore at home, using one of these assigned love languages will increase the likelihood that he or she will do the task.
Teachers, if you are having trouble getting a student to listen to your instructions, using one or two of these love languages will drastically improve his or her diligence in the allotted directions. Please contact us and allow us to serve you by teaching you these skills. Consults can be arranged as an in-service in school and churches in the Orlando, Winter Park, Lake Mary, and Clermont area, or by individual sessions in our Orlando, Winter Park, Lake Mary, and Clermont offices. (407) 248-0030
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