Bully Therapist Message to Parents of Bullies | 3 Tips for parents to stop their child’s bullying

By Published On: July 28th, 20182.7 min read

When I first read the story about Jamey Rodemeyer I was saddened that a young boy had lost his life.  He had so much life ahead of him.  There are many reasons that cause a person to end their life but bullying influenced his decision.  Now there is a school that is hurting, parents and friends that are grieving.  The story caught the attention of Lady Gaga who dedicated a song to him and also tweeted, “Bullying must become illegal.  It is a hate crime!”

According to reports one post said. “I wouldn’t care if you died.  No one would.  So just do it!  It would make everyone WAY more happier!”

How could your child write this to someone?  Did the parents of the individual who wrote this know about it?  There are many articles and thoughts for parents to prevent their child from being bullied, but I would like to focus on tips for parents whose children are bullies.

As a parent no one looks at their child and has the goal that their child will grow up and verbally or physically hurt someone.  When looking into his or her babies eyes no daddy or mommy says, when you grow up I hope you will become a bully.

Reasons why your child might be a bully:

  1. Low Self-Esteem
  2. Want their friends to like them
  3. Anger Issues
  4. Unable to forget something from the past

3 Tips for Parents of Bullies:

Make time to know your child:

Life is extremely busy and non-stop.  No one is denying that a parent is being pulled in every direction.  But it is crucial that you stay connected with your child.  Put away distractions like your iphone, turn off the TV or Computer and sit down with them and let them talk to you.  Go to an activity that they enjoy and just be there.  Watch a ballgame with them.  Go to a movie.  Remember you were their age once.  What did you wish your mom or dad would have done with you?

Monitor what is being said on the internet:

Remember you own the electronic device they are on.  It is okay to set a healthy boundary to know what they are doing on the internet.  If they do not like it reassure them that you understand, but it goes with the privileged of being on the phone and computer.

Evaluate friends and outside influences:

Because a bully is not a loner know that your child is not usually acting alone.  Know your child’s friends.  Talk to the parents of your child’s friends.  Create an environment where your children can have friends over.

Remember to start as many of these tips when they are young.  But no matter when you start it is never too late to be involved in your child’s life.

I cannot imagine what the parents of the alleged bullies must be going through, but I know I do not want that to happen to any other parents.  If you see signs of your child acting like a bully act NOW.

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Matthew Martin
Matthew Martin, MS uses his great sense of humor to connect with students, individuals and couples. Matt is known for his ability to quickly connect and impact individuals, help men with their marriage and workplace issues, and quickly discern a person’s struggles and provide effective solutions. Matthew’s passion is to help people experience joy in their relationships and life. Matthew Martin is a Registered Mental Health Counselor Intern and has a Master’s of Science degree in Counseling Psychology from Palm Beach Atlantic University in Orlando, FL. Matthew is married and has two sons. Matthew worked in a residential program with middle school boys with behavioral struggles. He was responsible for everyday aspects of the program, and held weekly therapeutic meetings with the students. He assisted the students’ progress by presenting them with alternative choices to their behaviors, and he regularly met with students and their parents to discuss the students’ progress. Matthew’s integrity, charisma and wisdom gave him many opportunities to mentor and counsel his fellow students in his dorm and the university’s football team.

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About the Author: Matthew Martin

Matthew Martin, MS uses his great sense of humor to connect with students, individuals and couples. Matt is known for his ability to quickly connect and impact individuals, help men with their marriage and workplace issues, and quickly discern a person’s struggles and provide effective solutions. Matthew’s passion is to help people experience joy in their relationships and life. Matthew Martin is a Registered Mental Health Counselor Intern and has a Master’s of Science degree in Counseling Psychology from Palm Beach Atlantic University in Orlando, FL. Matthew is married and has two sons. Matthew worked in a residential program with middle school boys with behavioral struggles. He was responsible for everyday aspects of the program, and held weekly therapeutic meetings with the students. He assisted the students’ progress by presenting them with alternative choices to their behaviors, and he regularly met with students and their parents to discuss the students’ progress. Matthew’s integrity, charisma and wisdom gave him many opportunities to mentor and counsel his fellow students in his dorm and the university’s football team.
author avatar
Matthew Martin
Matthew Martin, MS uses his great sense of humor to connect with students, individuals and couples. Matt is known for his ability to quickly connect and impact individuals, help men with their marriage and workplace issues, and quickly discern a person’s struggles and provide effective solutions. Matthew’s passion is to help people experience joy in their relationships and life. Matthew Martin is a Registered Mental Health Counselor Intern and has a Master’s of Science degree in Counseling Psychology from Palm Beach Atlantic University in Orlando, FL. Matthew is married and has two sons. Matthew worked in a residential program with middle school boys with behavioral struggles. He was responsible for everyday aspects of the program, and held weekly therapeutic meetings with the students. He assisted the students’ progress by presenting them with alternative choices to their behaviors, and he regularly met with students and their parents to discuss the students’ progress. Matthew’s integrity, charisma and wisdom gave him many opportunities to mentor and counsel his fellow students in his dorm and the university’s football team.